What does trauma-informed massage therapy actually mean? For me, first and foremost it’s the acknowledgement that you may have gone through something traumatic that has negatively affected your mindbody, and that you’ve decided to take steps to heal. This is a huge step, and one that takes tremendous courage. So if this is you, thank you.
It’s an acknowledgement that trauma can take many different forms. Emotional trauma, physical trauma, medical trauma, sexual trauma, generational trauma, the death-by-a-thousand-cuts trauma of everyday existence; often a combination. This may present itself as (C)PTSD, body dysmorphia, feeling disconnected/disassociated from your body, body image issues/shame, generalized anxiety, or having an adversarial relationship with your body / feeling betrayed by it – to name but a few.
It’s an acknowledgement that once you start exploring this path, there is no knowing how your mind and body may react, and that all reactions are equally valid.
It’s an acknowledgement that in order for us to do the work you don’t have to share the actual trauma that brought you here, unless you feel that it will help you heal.
It’s an acknowledgement that you do not have to go at this alone, and that it takes a team, ideally one that includes a psychotherapist.
It’s a promise to create a safe, open-minded, curious, nonjudgemental, and compassionate container in which we work together with whatever comes up. A space where you, the client, is in control and can at all times stop, pause, or redirect what we’re doing, and where we take the time needed to assess where you’re at both before and after our sessions.
It’s a journey to reintegrate (parts of) your body back into your whole being.
Mindbody? Whole being? What?!?
I’ve used the terms “mindbody” and “whole being” a few times so far. You’ll see these mentioned in other places too, but I wanted to share what they mean to me. I went through a traumatic event in 2019 and before that I never gave much thought to how the mind and the body interact. Even though the English language has separate words for them – that I would at times use to denote a specific part of my being – I never experienced them as two separate entities. My event changed that dramatically, and it suddenly felt like a huge chasm had opened between what I now could very clearly identify as two separate parts (that were not on good terms at all.)
I can now see that at the time this was a necessary survival strategy, but after a while the constant battle and distrust between the two turned me into an anxious mess. With the help of my psychotherapist I started to build back to a being that was if not whole, at least symbiotic in nature. During that process (which is still ongoing), I realized that the language was not helping. Yes, mind and body are parts that deserve to be named and experienced individually, but I found that I needed to contextualize these as part of an overarching entity, and I ended up settling on “mindbody” and “whole being”, which I pretty much use interchangeably. (Note: since writing this my thinking has somewhat evolved to include our spirit.)
Your experience and journey may be very different, and this may or may not resonate. If it does, I hope this framework will be helpful.
When you come in
So, what does all this look like in practice? Well, it starts with a calm and tranquil environment. And with a calm and tranquil therapist :). This is your time, and I’m here to support you in any way that I can as long as it’s within the scope of my practice.
When you come in the first time I will first ask you to fill out my intake form (unless you’ve done that previously online, in which case, thank you!) Then we sit down and talk. We’ll talk about how/if you’re feeling in your body, and how that manifests itself. If you’ve had previous massage therapy experience we’ll talk about how that was for you. If not, we’ll talk about what to expect.
I don’t need to know what happened to you in order for us to work together, though it will be helpful to know how it is presently affecting your body and your experience of your body. That said, if you would like to share (some of) what happened, there is space for that.
I’ll likely ask you to rate certain aspects on a 1 – 10 scale. Depending on your situation these might look like: How disconnected do you feel from your body today? Or, how anxious do you feel right now? Or, how angry are you at your body? If there are specific sensations or lack thereof in your body, I will ask you to rate the intensity of those. The goal of these questions is to get a baseline, and to over time reduce the intensity of these feelings, and/or diminish the disconnect between you and (parts of) your body.
When I say that this is your time, that means that you are in full control the entire time. I will ask you before we start if there are any areas of your body that you wouldn’t want me to work on, and it is totally ok to change your mind about that in the spur of the moment. I’ll check in with you periodically, and it is totally ok for you to tell me you don’t like something at any given time (or to tell me you did like something and weren’t ready for me to move on yet) – don’t feel like you need to just power through. You won’t hurt or upset me, it will not be an imposition, and I won’t judge you – in fact it’s one of the most helpful things you can do for me as a therapist.
It is perfectly ok for you to have an emotional reaction; if that happens you decide how and if you want to proceed. It is totally ok to decide you want to end the session at any time. We can never quite know what our body and mind will do, and so I encourage you to be open, curious, and compassionate towards yourself. No need to beat yourself up if things don’t go as you had hoped to or intended. This is all part of the process.
After the session we’ll spend some time talking about how the experience was for you, which we can use to direct the next session. You might find that a certain pressure brings up feelings, and we may avoid or explore that the next time. You may have felt more, or less connected to certain parts of your body, and we may want to explore that the next time. You may have been able to relax and drift off for the first time in a long while, or, this whole physical touch thing may have felt weird or even alien to you – which is why it can be good to have a psychotherapist on your team to integrate this work with.
I’ll also revisit the questions I asked you before we started and will ask you to rate these again. There may be a change, there may not be; and that’s totally ok too. Not infrequently people won’t notice an immediate change, but realize in the days after that something has shifted. Sometimes this may take a few sessions. Over time you will likely start to notice a difference in how you relate to your body.
I applaud any steps you take to heal, even if it is a single appointment. That said, a lot has likely happened to you to get you to where you are, and I would recommend trying to commit to a number of sessions to start to counter that, as these things take time to shift.
After a certain time you might notice that the nature of the work is changing from rebuilding to maintaining, and that may change how often, or even if, you come in. It’s also possible that after a few sessions you decide this is not for you. Here too, you are in full control, and I will fully support whatever decision you come to.
In closing
I hope this is helpful in deciding whether it makes sense for us to work together. Of course, if you have questions, I’m always happy to spend some time talking before you decide whether you want to come in. And if you see a psychotherapist, I’m more than happy to talk to them as well before or during our work together if this would be helpful to you. If you do want to reach out you can reach me at korneel@woodstockmassageworks.com, or 347-693-9340 (text is best initially.) I look forward to hearing from you!